The Saints went Marching, yada yada...

Usually the build-up to the Super Bowl and all of the requisite excitement would have warranted many, many blathering posts by now. Instead, that was left to those who will have to shut their cake holes for the next five months, since they can speak out loud of nothing that does not tie in to the status of Dwight Freeney's ankle without sounding like they live in their mother's basement and blog from a table next to their comic book collection and pricing catalogs. Instead, a playoffs-in-review:

J-E-T-S! Jets, Jets, Jets!

They played well. They have a rookie QB (Mark Sanchez, from USC). That rookie QB has a cutesy nickname (The Sanchize). That QB will probably go the way of Scott Brown, pose nude for Cosmo and run for governor of California in fifteen years. Nonetheless, it gave New Yorkers (er, New Jersey residents, since the team plays and practices in New Jersey) something to cheer for between shovel loads of icy sludge being flung from their driveways.

The Jets had the NFL's top-rated defense during the regular season, proving them to be a very good football team coached by a rather obese man (Rex Ryan) who casually mentioned in a recent interview that his daily caloric intake is 7,000. Per day. By himself. Holy s**t. It is very possible that we will see a cardiac episode replayed from multiple camera angles in the not-too-distant future...

In any event, that great defense and rotund coach got smoked like a pack of Kool's in the second half of the AFC Championship game by Peyton Manning and the Colts. Number one defense, meet Peyton Manning. Peyton, meet the Jets suddenly porous secondary and non-tackling linebackers and safeties. Enjoy each other.

Vikings, Favre, cut out hearts in the Heartland...again.

Malcolm Gladwell, renowned author of books like 'The Tipping Point' and 'Blink', is, among other things, an avid sports fan. 7DB wonders how he would 'thin-slice' the 2009 Minnesota Vikings season with Brett Favre at quarterback and Brad Childress as the head coach. With all apologies to Mr. Gladwell in advance, allow me to speculate:

The Minnesota Vikings have a long history of coming up just short in the Big Game, having lost the NFL's championship game four time since 1969, as well as having come up just short on three other notable occasions (1987, 1998, 2000). With this in mind, a reach out to a veteran field general makes good sense, as the assembled talent is on par with other premiere teams in the sport in all aspects other than quarterback.

Brett Favre is a quarterback who has won before, having won more games than any other NFL quarterback, including the 1997 NFL championship while employed by the Green Bay Packers. His devil-may-care style at quarterback is a high-risk/high-reward gambit, and it is one that the Vikings would be well-justified in taking on. So, why shouldn't they?

In the last two seasons coming into the 2009 season, Favre has ended his team's season with poor play during the playoff season. The 2007 Packers and the 2008 Jets both began making reservations for golf course tee times after Favre threw ill-advised passes that the opposing team caught to advance to the league's ultimate game. The high-risk/high-reward model brought these two teams that far, yet ended identically.

The Vikings have their own history with these types of defeat (Darrin Nelson's unfortunate fumble against Washington in 1987, Gary Anderson's first missed kick of the year in the 1998 game to qualify for the Super Bowl) and, if history can be quantified, these two entities match up perfectly to create another sad ending for their mutual seasons.

While very few of the players are the same from these examples, the one holding the football last seems to be the same. Viking fans should beware of this tendency.

Once again, I thank the mythical version of Malcolm Gladwell for his appearance.

As a Viking household, Casa du 7DB kept a skeptical distance from embracing this year's squad, despite a strong regular season and a rather efficient season from Favre (his best statistical season ever). The 'tipping point' came in the fourth quarter of the NFC Championship game against the eventual champions from New Orleans. After a solid showing by the Vikings defense, Favre and the offense began driving the ball at the end of the game, needing only a few yards to be in position for their reliable kicker to score the game-winning field goal. Some unfortunate play calls from the coaches left Minnesota with a third-and-two from about the 35 yard line of the Saints. A 52-yard field goal, while no gimmie, is very makeable for a veteran like Ryan Longwell.

This is the point in time. When a fan believes that everything in the balance can be changed by their behavior, despite being far removed from the field of play. No trips to the kitchen were allowed. The remote had to stay in the left hand. All of the anti-jinx behavior was in full effect...and then...

There is a picture in my wallet, taken at the holiday work picture day that big companies like my father's employer ran in the 70's. This one was taken in December 1976, coincidentally the last time the Vikings went to the Super Bowl, and the year Family 7DB attended a pro football game for the first time. All the images of being able to replace that photo in the wallet with one of Mr. and Ms. 7DB taken at the wedding filled the mind. 2009! Maybe this was the year, since all we did this year was so exciting and wonderful...wedding, moving into a big, new house...good luck charms, all of that...

Ms. 7DB says "Don't do it!", knowing of jinxes as a lifelong fan of the Michigan Wolverines football program.

.............of course, you know what happens now, right?.........

The Vikings promptly call a bad time-out, then send too many players into the huddle before play resumed, causing a five-yard penalty. Then Favre, who killed the Vikings for years as the QB of the Packers, kills the Vikings as the QB of the Vikings by throwing back across his body while running, making an ineffective pass that was easily intercepted by the Saints. If Favre fell down where he threw from, Longwell kicks for the win from 56. Damn.

Game was still tied, but momentum was in motion. Overtime was inevitable. Woulda bet all future earnings that New Orleans wins that coin flip and makes a field goal after driving 30 yards. Ugh. Stomach Punch.

I could go on for a long bit about whys and whats, but it is the destiny of that team. Ugh.

Saints and Colts turned out surprising, but heart-warming. Super Bowl MVP Drew Brees holding up his 18-month old son wearing itty-bitty headphones to not deafen him in that atmosphere will be the enduring image of that game, despite Peyton Manning looking like the bully down the street kicked him in the groin and stole his Bomb Pop. 7DB hopes that those who worked so hard to help rebuild New Orleans and the area after Hurricane Katrina were able to take time to savor some positive press about their city for awhile, before they have to go back to mopping up vomit from college kids during Mardi Gras this week. They deserve it.

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Barack Obama is a record-setting President. He has made more speeches than the last 23 Presidents combined (rough estimate), and took shots at the Supreme Court during his State of the Union Address.

While admittedly playing a tough hand dealt to him by circumstance, the self-glorification tour of a populist President selling snake oil...er, health care...is not what those who supported a more moderate Democrat than Hillary in the primaries bargained for. Obama has proven to be an activist President with a liberal bent, and this will not serve the Congressmen and -women well when they run again after backing this dude. Sadly for the Republicans, the party is dominated by severely right-leaning people in the eyes of the media, so no apparent countermeasure is available at this time to dream about in 2012. Which leads us back to our 2012 naked Presidential candidate, Scott Brown...

(...more to follow on the pending Scott Brown / Sarah Palin videos being produced in the San Fernando Valley as we speak...)

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Some may have noticed that Seven Dollar Bill added a Support Haiti button on this very page. Hopefully, many of you have chipped in with a text to 90999 (write 'Haiti' in the text, and it sends ten bucks to the Red Cross for support) or via other means. Let us not make the mistake we have made in other lands, and forget about this catastrophe in the next news cycle.

This is a rare opportunity to rebuild a country known more for its flawed governments, corrupt business and civic leaders, and violent criminal history than for its natural beauty and passionate citizenry. Papa Doc and Baby Doc Duvalier were probably the only things most people between 25 and 70 thought of when the name Haiti was mentioned. Now the thought of 200,000-plus dead people and a country's capital lying in ruins with no war involved dominate the images.

As a policy, 7DB does not endorse foreign aid for most soveriegn counrties. Low-interest loans and trade deals can be good, but handouts generally do not work. In Haiti's case, however, the international community has the power to free a people trapped in poverty and political oppression with money and technology, and we as a global citizenry would be foolish not to seize the opportunity. Scratch the check, people...especially you folks in Iceland. You made us listen to Bjork, and this is a good way to pay us all back.

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In closing, the differences between Northern and Southern California are multiple and stark. The biggest difference? Northern California suffers through four months of crappy weather and constant (albeit mostly mild) precipitation, then Southern California thieves the water to grow lush grass on their lawns while they go roller blading on the Strand. This makes SoCal feel and act entitled and makes NoCal (oops, it's called 'NorCal') bitter like Boston sports fans. No wonder they wanted to split this state in two...